My First Grader

This morning I dropped Kobe off at school as a FIRST GRADER!!!! I can't believe my baby is in First Grade already! Where has time gone??

To: Kobe

You are such an awesome little boy! I'm very proud of you. You will always be Mommy's little boy no matter how old you are. You seriously bring me so much joy in my life.. I can't wait to watch you grow up..
Love you - Mom

1. What do you want to be when you grow up?
-Police Man
2. What is your favorite color?
-Blue
3. What is your favorite thing to do?
-Go outside and Play
4. Who is your best friend?
-Zane
5. What is your favorite animal?
-Dog
6. What is your favorite food?
-Brownies
7. What is your favorite drink?
-Chocolate Milk
8. What is your favorite song?
-I treat my truck like a Cadillac
9. What is your favorite TV show?
-Turtle Man
10. Did you have fun on your first day of First Grade?
-Yes!!!!!

The Spaz has decided..

We after several weeks of being a stressed out Spaz.. I have realized that I would feel better with Kobe coming to town with me and going to school.. Not because of the whole viking/Hatchet thing either lol but because he will only be a block away and not 7 miles away.. Maybe next year we can try Barr-Reeve.. but then the thought of him only being able to play baseball and basketball in High School makes me want to send him in town still.. He's so good at soccer and I hope he sticks with it.. but who knows.. He may not play sports..he may be like his dad (Jason ;) ) and just want to be a county boy who hunts and fishes.. but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.. But he is already registered and books bought.. So its official!!

Why?!?

Why am I stressing out so much about this whole Washington/Barr-Reeve school thing??? Working in Washington and being here all the time I feel like Kobe needs to came here with me.. and go to the school that is basically a block away.. If he would go to BR then I would have to drive there to get him and bring him back to work with me (which is fine) but that would mean I drive from Home (15 mins from work) to work then after school drive half way home to get Kobe then come back to work then drive another 15 mins home after work.. thats too much driving.. am I right? and I dont have the most reliable vehichle... But then I think .. well what if one morning I go out and the van wont start and I can't make it to Washington then what? Kobe just doesnt go to school that day?? uuugh seriously this is making me crazy.. Im not kidding.. Its all I think about.. Jason says.."Just pick one, its not that big of a deal." Yes it is.. to ME! Too ME it is.. Maybe I'm over reacting.. Maybe I over think. Maybe I'm a spaz! who knows.. But I do know it makes my stomach hurt thinking about all this.. I have a slight panic attack.. Then a facebook friend posted an innocent status and in the status it said "...to start in one elementary and be able to stay there with the friends she makes and not have to jump around from school to school..." ... I just start bawling.. Its like WOW thats sooo true and My son isn't going to know anyone.. except Jason's nephew.. He's made so many friends in Washington.. He's going to have to start that whole "new" process over again.. I hate new, I hate changes, I have the urge to cry right now as I'm typing this.. I know my hormones are out of wack.. not being pregnant, then pregnant, now not pregnant again.. They are going haywire inside me and I don't like it..

Back to Square one..

I had blood work again on Tuesday... However it went okay.. better than before.. One stick this time but once she was in the blood only dripped in and then stopped but they got enough to test my levels. I didn't hear from the doctors office until almost 5. But my levels were down to 16 so no more blood work for me. I'm assuming that once I have my normal visit from that hag "Aunt Flo" We can start trying again..

I had to go in the spare room the other night to switch the blinds from Kobe's room with the spare room.. I walked in and there the room was set up like a nursery. We had bought a changing table off Facebook and it was in the room and on top was the boppy I had gotten free, the bib I purchased, and the pacies that Mom had purchased..Then there is the all white dresser that matches the changing table.. It made me sad.. but most of all it made me determined.. Eager to try again and get that baby I know we will be blessed with. I can't wait to try again.. although I am scared but its not stopping me one bit. I pray it will happen fast and things will be just perfect this time.. I've started taking prenatal vitamins and I was told men should take folic acid so I'm going to get J-bird some to take.. So fingers crossed and prayers flying....

..In with the new!

We are all moved and I wished we could say unpacked as well.. however I am unpacked except for the living room wall decor and our bedroom.. The kitchen and Kobe's room are completely unpacked and have things put away. Its so over whelming getting things together and making it feel like our home.. although I LOVE our house! I'm so happy with it.. I can't wait til the newness wears off and its "normal" to us all..

This is the view from our back yard! Sooo peaceful!

My wonderful Husband and cousin stayed home from the wedding this past weekend to move all the stuff.. I came home to a fully moved house and my hubby had unpacked Kobe's bedroom and the living room :) I was sooo very thankful!

My cousin TJ got married this past weekend.. His wedding was beautiful and  very personal.. I loved it! However My sister and I had to serve cake and O..M..G that was a disaster lol THANK GOD for my Aunt Donna who came to our rescue lol.. we were told to start at the bottom and work our way up LOL WROOOONG lol my Aunt runs over and quietly says your girls are gonna make the cake fall if you do that.. so she took over the cutting.. I'm sooo thankful for Aunt Donna she saved us.. the cake was melting before our eyes lol.. the icing was running and the cake was just crumbling into dust.. it was a mess but people still ate it lol we had icing EVERY where.. AGAIN sooo Thankful for my Aunt Donna who came to the rescue...

Beautiful cake...

The After math.. Bahaha sorry Lisa and TJ... it really wasn't our fault... the cake was too warm..

 But we had a good time.. We enjoyed seeing cousins that we only get to see on holidays..

Our hotel was nice.. it had an indoor pool which Kobe loved and got to get in 2 times

He is still so afraid of water.. he tried taking his floaties off but he ended up with them back on.. I know he felt silly cause he was the only "big kid" (between his cousins) that couldn't swim.. I really need to teach him or put him in swim lessons.. he tried his hardest to swim.. it broke my heart... After the wedding we headed back down to the pool at 10:30 and swam with all the cousins til they kicked us out of the pool about 11:15pm...

Still trying to decide on which school Kobe is going to go too.. I'm thinkin more towards Barr-Reeve but I don't know.. Like I told my sister-in-law.. I'm a nervous wreck. I'm a creature of habit and I don't like new things.. I'm trying to weigh all my pros and cons..

Here are some pics from this past week(end):

The Newly Weds

Kobe trying to catch the football with the garter on it..

Mom and Dad during the couples dance

Free Breakfast at the hotel.. the biscuits and gravy were good.. eggs not so much lol..

Kobe and Liv havin breakfast at the hotel and enjoying each others company

Wooohooo!

Jason and I are buying a house!!! We are so excited! Its not in Washington.. can you believe it.. I'm not going to be living in Washington anymore?? I never thought I would be saying those words. However I'm just 8 miles away from Washington lol. Not like its a huge move away. I'm still torn between what school to send Kobe.. I can have him still go here in Washington since I'll be working here or I can send him to the school he's supposed to go too.. I snapped some pics while we were there looking at the house and since its a final deal I'll post them..

Here is the front of the house ( needs some Landscaping)

As you walk in this is the living room

Off to the right of the living room is the Master Bedroom

Master Bedroom With his and her bathrooms the one you can see is my(Her) bathroom the one back at the edge of the pic is Jason's(His) bathroom

HER- My Bathroom

Then you can either go back out through the bedroom or walk through our huge walkin closet to the His Bathroom

HIS- Jason's Bathroom

Then off to the left of the living room is the kitchen WITH **drum roll please** a DISH WASHER!!! I was PUMPED!

Kitchen

 The room straight through (in between Jason and my Grandpa) is the mudroom/laundry room
Then the door way in between Grandpa and the stove is a hallway on the left is Kobe's room

Kobe's room

Then in the middle of the hall is the guest/Kobe's bathroom

Guest/Kobe's Bathroom

Then down the hall is the spare bedroom.. hopefully a Baby room one day soon..

Spare Room

 We have a big ole nice back yard with a work shop for Jason... Its a country setting so the guys (and I) are pumped! We are very excited! Now its packing time which I'm not looking fwd too.. Jason and I packed one room.. our room.. last night.. that was not fun.. lol now I need to go clean up the livingroom and get is packed before Jason gets home so it looks like I did something LOL...

Goodness Gracious

 So much for chuggin that 32oz Gatorade before I went to the doctor to get blood drawn.. It didn't help. We barely got any blood. The nurse was like "I know you have blood in you, I'm sitting here talking to you." lol I'm beginning to think I don't have blood  or veins for that matter. I was stuck 4 times this time and had to have warm compresses again which didn't help. I love the nurse that does it though.. so it doesn't make it too bad.. She's sweet and sympathetic. I feel sorry for her though. She probably cringes when she has to come get me in the waiting room.. lol! The reason I'm still getting blood work done is because they are still testing my levels to make sure my levels go down since I miscarried.. praying they do and I dont have to have a D&C..

I still have my moments. I was in Dollar General with Kobe who was spending his profit from our yardsale, and I walked by the baby section and went to grab a onesie to buy.. only to get this feeling in my heart when I quickly remembered I had no reason to buy it anymore.. then the tears flowed.. I hung out in the shoe section while I gathered my self and wiped the tears away.. I have been having awful dreams too.. I had a dream I went to the bathroom and there was TONS of blood and in the toilet was a clear sac with a dead baby in it :( hopefully I'll stop having those dreams and cry sessions soon..

Also Kobe handled it fine.. he just doesn't really get it I don't think... When I told him "Mommy doesn't have a baby in my belly anymore." he asked why? I told him God needed that baby to be with him.. he then asked if I can get a different baby in there.. I told him to ask God in his prayers if he'll put another baby in there.. he then asked.. "So can we get another cat since you aren't pregnant?" so I think he's fine :) I've learned my lesson.. I will NOT tell anyone especially Kobe that I'm pregnant until Im in the "clear" next time.. I got ahead of myself.. but I was just soooo excited.. it was something I prayed, hoped and tried to hard for ;) I never once thought "I might miscarriage" O-well You live and you learn... "Life's a dance, you learn as you go"